"there's no crying in baseball!"

I have to say after the message today at church & all I have learned about change through life experiences & choosing how to respond, for some reason today it's a bit tough to trip up the cynic taking a joy-ride in my brain.  Autism is kinda on my last nerve lately (putting it nicely), seeing the effects it has not only on us but on countless others.  It is equally fascinating & frustrating.  I just want to run up to the top of some mountain & YELL...  "I want to talk to my son!!!  I don't want to worry about possible escapes!!!  I don't want my boys to struggle with painful sensory triggers!!  I hate seeing them in melt-downs & aggravating behaviors & not knowing how to deal with it sometimes...especially in public!!  I am exhausted of the schedules & coordinating & trying to figure out how to spend time as a family!!! Everything has changed!!!"  Holidays are tainted by a few circumstances, we can't just get up & go like a lot of families to just go do something, I lost my favorite fishing spot & haven't caught a fish in 2yrs (ok, now I'm just whining lol).   Ugh, alright, time to suck it up DeLauter...  this gave me some perspective, check it out...

...As much as it hurts sometimes being pressed & chipped away at, I know it's only shaping me/us to be more... building character, strength, & a bunch of other motivational words I don't feel like searching my brain for right now.   It's not what I had in my playbook, sometimes I have to pull off a fake to get back into the game, but I know the prize far out ways the cost.  I have a husband that loves me for me & four incredible kids I get to spend time with in our own special way,  I have no doubt what I am here to do, & the goal is simple... to love & serve.   I'd say... I've got it made.