"sometimes saying no means saying yes to something else"

God has ridiculously blessed me with amazing friends... those who know practically everything about me, even the darkest parts, & they never left my side & still put up with me ;) 

After a day like today, a day where I trusted that all would be okay if I walked inside for just a sec from where Devyn was playing in the backyard... "he's been doing great lately" was my rationale. I wish I would get it through my thick skull that you can never let your guard down, never. Devyn has a more severe form of Autism, he is non-verbal & prone to wander off with no sense of danger.  We have experienced a few elopements, most of the time we are just a few steps behind but there have been 3 now that have made us have to rethink our safety plans. One landed us in the emergency room, one involved a 45min police/neighbor/family search, & today, thankfully, our sweet neighbor found him within 15mins. Thank God for His help to focus & not let emotion get in the way. Once the adrenaline wears off, like it is now...everything floods in. What is wrong with me to think I could chance that? Why does my son have to struggle with this? Why can't I figure out how to talk to him & help him understand? What if he figures out the windows & the locks? Will the alarms be effective? 

Another crazy situation arose not long after the "Devyn incident" in where I should have exercised my "no" skills immediately. I thought I could help & it would be a good thing. Ehhh wrong!! I win the stupid award. First thing that hit my mind was my friend's line, "sometimes saying no means saying yes to something else." In this case, saying yes to using my brain :/

So back to my point, after a day like today...the one's that stop you in your tracks & force you to re-evaluate, it's time to pull out the resources before "Dark Alley Beth" takes over: reflect on encouraging words from friends, take the instant feed of negative thoughts captive to Christ (2Cor. 10:5) & replace them with truth (John 8:32) as often as it takes. Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose." That answers some of the "why's" & "what if's". Sometimes forgiving ourselves is the hardest thing, but God says "seventy times seven"...Matt 18:21-22. Phil 1:6 & 4:13 & 2Cor 12:9, shoot out the monster thought saying I'm not equipped or good enough. Now to squash the rest, Phil 4:6-7 says, ⁶ Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.